you may be shocked to see just how much less Wie the people would have to stomach (no pun intended).

Rule 1:
No, not all women shall be banned from men’s events.  If they can legitimately qualify for the tournament and have proven themselves on their own Tour, then we would love to watch them compete.

Rule 2:
No person, man or woman, shall be allowed to play in a PGA Tour event on a sponsor’s exemption.  People want to see the best golfers play, not the ones who will rake in more dough for John Deere.  Sponsors’ exemptions take spots from players who are out there trying to make a living.  (How would you like it if your boss said to you, “Um, listen Bill, we’re very sorry, but we’re going to have to fire you because a 17-year-old girl wants to try her hand at brain surgery.  She’s not quite up to par with the other brain surgeons, but we feel she’ll draw some media attention to the hospital and we can make more money.”)

Rule 3:
She who wishes to play in a men’s event shall be a former LPGA champion.  In other words, the player must have at least 10 career wins on the LPGA Tour, 2 wins within the previous calendar year, and one career major victory.  This means the woman must establish herself on her own Tour, before trying to enter another.

Rule 4:
The female player shall have at least 5 years of experience in the LPGA before attempting to enter a PGA event.  Nobody can come in and try to take the whole world by storm.  You can’t expect to just make the jump without first establishing some longevity and success on the less-demanding LPGA Tour.

These four simple rules will keep players from entering PGA Tour events simply for money or attention.  If Annika Sorenstam wants to give the men’s Tour a shot, fine.  She could enter in the U.S. or British Open for all I care.  In fact, if a woman did manage to legitimately qualify for a major, I’d be driving the bandwagon rooting for them.  However, she should be required to take the same qualifying route as every other golfer in the field.

So really Michelle, it’s not you, it’s me.  I’m sick of the unwarranted attention you command by your mere presence. Get back to me when you win on your own Tour.