2006 Olympics There is an old adage declaring that March comes in like a lion and goes out like a lamb. And though the Torino Olympics took place in February, the majority of the fans who spoke out seemed to feel the same way about this 2006 competition. So what can be done to assure that the subsequent Vancouver games will generate excitement throughout? The answer is simple, the Winter Olympics need to reconnect with the everyman.
While watching these Torino games, it was easy to imagine the influence that everyday life must have had in the creation of many of the events.
For example, Nordic skiing was the primary mode of winter transportation in Europe for centuries. Hockey has been a popular winter sport in the northern hemisphere for over two hundred years. And Austrians have probably been ski jumping for just as long as they have been hanging out in alpine bars and making drunken dares.
So it is safe to say that the Winter Olympics, at least at one point, was a showcase or outlet or sorts for common folks around the globe.
But somewhere along the way things got really nuanced. Long distance skiers started to carry rifles and blast targets. Curlers decided to sweep perfectly clean ice. And couples began skating to Latin music while wearing matching blouses.
But fear not major networks. As a veteran of over two dozen winters , I have a plan to reconnect these games with Joe (snow) Blow. By adding some elements that better represent the day to day struggles of the season, ratings will soar and cabin fever will vanish.
Allow me to narrow my focus to bobsledding. The first thing that needs to be changed is the gear. No one I know goes sledding in body suits made out of bike shorts. So a switch must be made to bulky jackets, scarves, and mittens.
Another of my criticisms comes in that participants are coasting down an obstacle free course. And that is kind of a yawner to anyone who dodges snowplows each morning on their way to work. Adding cross traffic would improve the sport considerably. Disney might not make any movies documenting the Jamaican team’s ill fated collision with the salt truck, but they wouldn’t need to because who would forget it?
I also scoff at the large clear visor each driver peers out through. Anyone can make fancy turns with perfect visibility. But this time of year few conventional travelers have such a luxury. Whenever I am going anywhere after a snowstorm, I have two choices.
The first is to fully brush my car, let the engine warm, clear my windshield, and arrive late. The second is what I call the frozen tank. It involves scraping a one foot by two foot slot just above the steering wheel and charging ahead, leaving a trail of moon boots and snowmen in my wake.
I think bobsledding would benefit from the strategy that emerges out of such a choice. So fog up the helmets and ice up the windshields. Fans and cameramen beware.
My final stroke of genius would be in placing the finish line near a frozen river or stream. When teams glide through this portion of the run it would be up to them whether to steer clear or near the treacherous portions. If they want to see the medal stand, we might get to see some metal sink.
This would play huge in the flannel states. You see every year in rural America, countless yokels lose their pickups through the ice in pursuit of the illustrious last catch of the ice fishing season. Perhaps that’s why there’s a “duh” in Duluth..
Alas, the Torino Olympics are over, and sports fans will now shift their couch bound gaze to other sports. But if those planning the 2010 Vancouver Games take my advice, the biggest blizzard they will face is the storm of public interest.
Have more ideas for Olympic events? How about random tales of winter foolishness? Email them to Scott.Larson@atomicsportsmedia.com.
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